Dear Husband put it best, we’re going through a rough time right now. Combine a long sleep regression with Mini-ion #2 and separation anxiety in both mini-ions makes for two parents at odds. Not necessarily with each other, just at odds.
There are many days that are great days and many days that are good days. Rough days, when they come along, you hope they are only once in a while. But a rough day, day after day, starts to wear you down.
It can be tough on me, as the primary caregiver, frequently holding two mini-ions that are breaking down. And as one breaks down, the other breaks down harder, wanting to get THE attention. Any time dear husband tries to relieve the burden, the break downs increase at the mere thought of being separated from the one thing they want most in the world.
As a problem solver, I keep trying to solve the rough times we are going through, but as dear husband reminded me last night, sometimes you can’t solve, you just have to wait this phase out. It can be tough, day after day, night after night, sleep reduced, patience worn down, coping strategies worn out. I’ve yelled. More than once, which is one more time than I wanted to. I’ve cried, openly in front of the mini-ions, in which they’ve petted and hugged me, acknowledging my feelings. And just when I think I’m at the end of my wits, I find one more.
It can hurt us both. It hurts me to be frustrated, at times, by this burden. It hurts me to feel so out of control of my emotions, to just want to hit something I’m so mad, but have nothing to hit. I can only imagine it hurts dear husband to see me this frustrated, dead in the eyes, wanting to solve, but every effort is thwarted. On top of that, when he tries to connect with the mini-ions, to be very cruelly (with no intention of hurting him) rebuffed by these two beings he loves with all his heart.
This time will pass. At the end of the night, we’ll hold hands and take a deep sigh of relief that this very bad day is over, with hopes that the next one will be better. But I encourage you, if you see a mom or dad with a bit of deadness behind their eyes, it might be a series of very bad days. Either give them a wide berth or an opportunity for fun. Because they just might need it.